It really began about nine years ago. I was in college in Arkansas and was only 19 when I first fell in love with DC. For spring break Kendra and I decided to come and visit my cousin Gary. We were here for a week and I remember literally aching when we had to leave. Over the next few years of college, I would visit DC several more times. I even managed to land an internship that put me here the summer between my junior and senior year. I was here for two months that summer and I was hooked. I've heard it's actually called Potomac Fever. Whatever it was, I had it. Not only did I have it, I had it so bad that I went into a depression being back in Arkansas for my senior year. I made arrangements to move to DC and took off the day after I graduated. I had no job, $1000, and a lot of ignorance. Looking back, I can't believe I thought $1000 was a lot of money. My rent per month is more than that now! Anyway, I did have an apartment and a few of my intern friends here. Somehow the money was enough and I landed a job. I spent my free time exploring DC, meeting amazing people, and learning a lot about myself. What is it about DC that pulled me to it so much? I'm not completely sure. I never felt I fit in in Arkansas. I felt things clicked here and I felt the freedom to just be. That's the only way I can describe it. I love the beauty of the city and the history that surrounds it. Sometimes I walk around and I imagine who all walked here before me...JFK, Martin Luther King, George Washington! There is something in the air that I feel here. It's strange. Whenever I leave for a weekend, I can't wait to get back to DC. It's the feeling of home.
What does any of this have to do with Italy? Well, the feeling I get in DC is pretty similar to the feeling I got when I was last in Italy. I cried when I left. I could feel it in my soul that a part of me belonged in Italy. There's just an inner connection that is indescribable. When I first made the decision to move to Italy, I was feeling nothing but excitement, happiness, and eagerness. I couldn't wait until I left! As my three months until my departure have begun to dwindle, the feelings have begun to shift and they've been overwhelming. The amount of excitement I'm feeling has gone from about 95% to about 40%. After the excitement, I switched to stress mode. I had SO many things to do. Now, more than anything, I'm starting to feel a sort of sadness. I'm really going to miss this city! I always knew I loved it here, but I didn't know that I was in love with it. I'm going to miss the culture, my lifestyle, the buildings, my favorite restaurants, and all the small nuances I've so come to admire. What I will miss most though is my family here.
About two weeks ago I was out Saturday night with a group of friends and I had such an amazing time (I still can't believe we didn't get kicked out of the hatter that night guys!). In the midst of our craziness, I paused to take a look at these people. I realized that they really have become my family here. I know that I can call on anyone of them at anytime (and I have) and they'll be there for me. My network of friends is amazing. I have a small group of best friends, an inner group of good, close friends and then a very large group of friends. Usually during the summers, I see these people about five times a week. They have become my comfort and I'm leaving my comfort zone for awhile. Things are changing. Several of us have moved or are moving and several have gotten engaged (eeeeek). We're growin' up kids! Anyway, I'm really going to miss my friends while I'm gone. I know that this is by no means the end to these friendships but it will be odd to not see these people on a regular basis. I will miss seeing them in the swerve, on the mall, at the movies, at pre-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving, at work, on the roof deck, dressed in jungle wear and santa suits, at f to the p, at the frat house, on the median, and wherever else life has taken us. I love you all and am thankful to have had you in my life over the past six years! I expect many visitors!
Today we sent my sister off to college. So I was thinking about all those new-beginning things you think about when you send somebody off to a new place. How she'll like the new digs, what kind of friends she'll make, how she'll like the work, the atmosphere, how she'll miss stuff back home, how we'll email more, how it'll be strange not to have her so close, etc.
